How quickly did you get rid of their stuff when your spouse died? How much did you simply throw away?

Deera

My husband passed away at home Sunday, September 14, 2014 while I was at work. When I got home at about 11:00 p.m, I found him in our bedroom with all three dogs on the floor around the bed. I called 911 and sat on the bed and held his hand. After everyone had left (sheriff and coroner) at about 1 a.m. and they had taken his body away, I sat on the couch in shock. What was I going to do with the rest of my life? I of course didn’t know at that point, but I did know what I was going to do to get through the rest of that godawful night. I grabbed the box of trash bags and stood in front of the refrigerator and cleaned it out. My husband was a pack rat and a bit of a gourmand, especially when it came to cheeses. I threw away a lot of cheese, as well as other things like olives and cocktail party foods. Then I opened up the freezer and pitched every piece of mystery meat that was up there. I went to the cupboards next and threw away everything in there that I would never eat, sardines, old snacks, whatever. Before you say “Wait, you could have donated that food to a pantry”, no I couldn’t have. It was all expired (by a long way, I found canned goods in the back of a cupboard that were years out of date), and you have to remember, I was in shock. I was in a frenzy, I filled up bag after bag with food that would never be eaten. The only thing I could think of was that the garbage went out on Monday, and it was already here. I didn’t want that food in my house any longer than I could help it. That garbage can was full before I knew it.

That week I also had to have someone come and take away the mattress that he died on, there were bodily fluids on it. I threw away probably 30 bottles of cologne that literally had nothing in them except the tiny bit on the bottom that the atomizer can’t reach. I also disposed of his underwear and socks. I did keep some of his clothing, a shirt that he wore often, and a Notre Dame leather jacket that I had bought him just after we met.

I donated a lot of his clothes before the end of that year, for tax purposes.

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